Pain and Optimism or Suffering and Pessimism?

Three things need to be defined: Pain, suffering and optimism. Depending on how you “count” things emotionally determines whether or not you experience pain and optimism or suffering and pessimism. If you emotionally count painful events as teachers, you experience optimism and ultimately, pleasure. If you emotionally count painful tings as tyrants, you experience pessimism and more pain.

Teachers expand your horizons, perspectives and possibilities whereas tyrants painfully narrow them. All life is a bell curve and there are things that can cause intense, prolonged pain, which equals suffering. The point is, most emotional suffering is temporary – if you choose to let go of the pain. Many of us spend more time and energy on nurturing pain and its companions rather than nurturing acceptance, peace of mind and eventually happiness. Nobody can take away your pain, so don’t let anybody take away your happiness.

Set up your expectations by finding a way to make your life better in spite of any and all upcoming, painful losses. Will that there be an upside to your situation – somehow and in some way. Leave yourself no other option because the only other option steals the one thing that you alone controls – your peace of mind. “Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming consequences of any misfortune.”

In ordinary, everyday painful situations (and others), we have two choices: We can turn the event into a tyrannical situation or a deep learning event. Even in less interesting or imaginative life situations, the following absolutely applies as a freedom key: “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a strange into a friend.” – Melody Beattie.

Anger does not heal the hurt, it only makes it worse. Do you want to keep doing the damaging work of the person who hurt you? Your resentment means you have agreed to keep hurting yourself as if you are their employee. Holding onto anger is like drinking poison.

Are there useful times for resentment? Absolutely yes, but most often no. You are the sole person responsible for your peace of mind. Not your spouse, children, friends or your parents. This is an awesome responsibility that carries with it the chance to experience real happiness – especially in the midst of conflict.

“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude.” – Dennis Waitley.

What the mind can conceive, the body can achieve.

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